BARBWIRE by ANDREW BARBANO Pirate Laureate of the High Desert Outback of the American Dream

Barbwire Archives

The two blackguards who cracked the formerly unbreakable egg of New York's Dannemora Prison will probably get retrieved more sooner than later.

As usual, the Barbwire FreakyLeaks Investigative Reporting Team has spared every expense in obtaining the following exclusive communications between the dynamic duo.

Amid all the speculation and rumormongering (pretty much all that's been available), no one has really gotten into the minds of the escapees.

Until now.

Herewith, random insights into what's going on in those desperate fugitive brains.

REGRETS & HOPES

— I wonder if that woman who helped us will lose her job.
— I'd hate to be the union rep stuck with defending her.
— Now will they hire my brother-in-law's security consulting firm?
— Brazil hasn't got an extradition treaty with the U.S. How do we find Joe Conforte's phone number in Rio?
— I'll miss the meatloaf.
— And the weekly riot drill.
— And my needlepoint class.
— I forgot the Jergens lotion. Tunneling is really hard on the hands.
— Do I look good in a beard?
— Do you think they'll miss us?
— Do you really think they'll come looking for us?
— Maybe we can get mining jobs.
— Do we qualify for unemployment?
— My only regret is that we've never had children.
— Prison is the ultimate cabin fever. We escape and end up in a damn cabin.

LAME EXCUSES IF WE GET CAUGHT

— We just went out for the 2-for-1 special at Applebee's and lost track of time.
— Whatta ya mean that a Monopoly "get out of jail free" card is no good?
— We were trying to avoid a riot by fixing the prison WiFi system that went down just before the premiere of "Orange is the New Black."
— Domino's didn't deliver our pizza in 30 minutes and they told us we'd have to pick up our freebie in person.
— We were merely rehearsing for the Prison Playhouse production of "Shawshank Redemption."
— We were actually trying to raise money for the prison budget by securing sponsorship from power tool manufacturers.

MARKETING

— The things you gotta do these days to get an agent for your book.
— Before we get caught, we gotta get into at least one good car chase or the movie script won't sell.
— I want DeNiro to play me when our screenplay goes into production.
— I don't look good in horizontal stripes. You got a problem with that?
— This has been a fact-finding trip. Our consulting firm is bidding on Nevada's new million-dollar execution chamber.
— They'll never find us at Burning Man!

DRUG CARTEL OVERLORD EL CHAPO: "When the heat dies down, I'll apply at a Wall Street bank or a tobacco company. I admire guys who steal billions and never go to jail. I must remember to renew my National Rifle Association membership."
_________

And to think that they pay psychologists for this kind of insight.

Be well. Raise hell. / Esté bien. Haga infierno. (Pardon my Spanglish.)

The Underbelly of the News—>Subscribe to Barbwire Confidential

BARBWIRE WEB EXTRAS...

FLAME OF KNOWLEDGE DEPT. The committee trying to save the Duncan/Traner Community Library hosts an open house and back-to-school celebration this Saturday from 11:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. at 1650 Carville Drive in Reno.

"We have back to school supplies, food and more but we need people willing to help. Come out to make it a great day for our community's youth," says committee chair Darryl Feemster. Info: 775-722-4303. More at RenoSparksNAACP.org/

BURNING DOWN THE HOUSE. Yes, the rumors are true. I want you to join Democrats for Trump at NVCaucus.com/

Who better deserves support from the party of the jackass?

TOMORROW'S NEWS TODAY: FEEL UP YOUR FIRE METER. The Reno Gazette-Journal did big spreads on three consecutive Sundays (Sept. 14, Sept. 21 and Sept. 28) on NV Energy smart meter fires. Welcome aboard. Barbwire readers were two years ahead on the fire meter issue. (Touch a Smart Meter, Go to Jail — 11 October 2012)

FIRE METER UPDATES: THE NEVADA FIRE MARSHALL'S INVESTIGATION concluded "don't worry, be happy." I'm still worried and will continue fondling NVE's precious equipment —> If your smart meter feels very hot, not just from sunshine, call 911.

In its Sunday 21 Dec. 2014 front page headline major story, the Reno Gazette-Journal published results of the NVEnergy-commissioned "don't worry, be happy" echo study. On 1-27-2015, the RGJ published an analysis based on veteran reporter Anjeanette Damon's review of more than 1,000 pages of documents. Barbwire bottom line: NVE handles this like auto manufacturers handle defects —> It's cheaper to pay legal settlements after people are injured or killed than to fix the problem.

Don'tcha worry 'bout a thing! If you can't trust your power company, who can you trust?

DIDN'T THEY MAKE A MOVIE CALLED "THE INCREDIBLES"? On 2-6-2015, the RGJ reported that the Public Utilities Commission has ordered NVE to hire an independent laboratory to review the material. UPDATE: The report said all is well. I still recommend feeling up your fire meter on a regular basis.

ANTE INTO THE GAME: Support the new season of Barbwire.TV by putting your money where my mouth is. A thousand thanks to those who keep sending show suggestions.

  Stay tuned.

  I encourage you to donate to the cause at Barbwire.TV/ The medium that shapes public opinion needs at least one refuge where it is not filtered through the distorted green eye shades of prissy corporate accountants for whom profit is the only priority; where self-censorship is the journalist's normal work environment and where all sins of omission are tacitly encouraged and forgiven with the wave of a balance sheet. This is important. We've got a lot of work to do.

Get ahead of corporate-influenced news—>Subscribe to Barbwire Confidential.

Be well. Raise hell. / Esté bien. Haga infierno. (Pardon my Spanglish.)

Andrew Barbano is a 46-year Nevadan, chair of the Nevada César Chávez Committee, producer of Nevada's annual César Chávez Day celebration, first vice-president and political action chair of the Reno-Sparks NAACP, labor/consumer/civil rights advocate, member of Communications Workers of America Local 9413/AFL-CIO and editor of NevadaLabor.com and JoeNeal.org and DoctorLawyerWatch.com/ As always, his opinions are strictly his own. Check local listings for other Nevada cable systems. E-mail barbano@frontpage.reno.nv.us. Barbwire by Barbano has originated in the Sparks Tribune since 1988.

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Smoking Guns... Get ahead of corporate-influenced news—>Subscribe to Barbwire Confidential Democrats for Trump Heroic lions, pampered elephants & sweating RINOS Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the Tuesday 8-4-2015 Sparks Tribune Ironic colonics, shameless strumpetry & repo men Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the Tuesday 7-28-2015 Sparks Tribune Moving the needle and needling the weasels Education funding hike non-existent / Confederate flags fly in Sparks Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the Tuesday 7-21-2015 Sparks Tribune School, life, death, taxes and other high ironies Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the Tuesday 7-14-2015 Sparks Tribune All the news you never knew you needed to know Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the Tuesday 7-7-2015 Sparks Tribune / Updated 7-9-2015 Applying Christian forgiveness to a fault Barbwire by Barbano / From the Tuesday 6-30-2015 Sparks Tribune Life & death tickle the underbelly of the news Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the Tuesday 6-23-2015 Sparks Tribune Al Capone takes stock of Nevada education Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the Tuesday 6-16-2015 Sparks Tribune / Updated 6-17-2015 The 2015 Nevada Legislature's greatest hits Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the Tuesday 6-9-2015 Sparks Tribune Chaos theory: Republicans learn to use their majority — on each other Cover Story by Dennis Myers / Reno News & Review 6-4-2015 Several related stories linked thereat Stench of sulfur suffuses Nevada's year of the gun Barbwire by Barbano / Uncensored full-length edition expanded from the censored Tuesday 6-2-2015 Sparks Tribune Updated D-Day, 6-6-2015: How I handled a similar situation Dogs and ponies, DARE traps and tokenism Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 5-26-2015 Sparks Tribune Corporate welfare unites me with the moonhowlers Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 5-19-2015 Sparks Tribune Hotplates, hotheads, hot rumors and hot Moose Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 5-12-2015 Sparks Tribune MayDay! The bright side of riots in the streets Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 5-5-2015 Sparks Tribune In the Uber-Nevada Legislature, words can kill Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 4-28-2015 Sparks Tribune Tesla rewrites history to chisel worker paychecks Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 4-21-2015 Sparks Tribune Radiation Nation: Gomorrah South bakes in the glow of victory Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 4-14-2015 Sparks Tribune Revenge, redistricting and amnesia in Cartoon City Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 4-7-2015 Sparks Tribune Harry Reid, Eddy Arnold, César Chávez and Gaga Madonna Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 3-31-2015 Sparks Tribune High noon for the high desert outback of the American Dream Small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, great minds discuss ideas. Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 3-24-2015 Sparks Tribune St. Patrick, I need a green energy beer Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 3-17-2015 Sparks Tribune Michele Fiore: the Italian girl mama wanted for me? Barbwire by Barbano / Excised from the 3-10-2015 Sparks Tribune as "not suitable" / Updated 3-12 and 3-13-2015 Who was that lady I saw you with last night? That was no lady, that was...none of your damned business! But can she cook? Barbano to legislative committee: Let Tesla, Switch and Apple help pay for police officer video cameras Clinging to the Ledge: guts, feathers and all Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 3-3-2015 Sparks Tribune We don't need no stinking wages! It became necessary to destroy the community in order to save it Barbwire by Barbano / Special online edition 2-26-2015 The skeleton of the underbelly of the news Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 2-24-2015 Sparks Tribune Parsing our parsimonious public pursers Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 2-17-2015 Sparks Tribune What else is new? Southern Nevada CLC authorizes strike sanction vs. wage violator. The flush of victory and the irony of deceit Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 2-10-2015 Sparks Tribune Senate Republicans take a jackhammer to the bedrock of Nevada trade unionism The last bastion of local hire comes under fire By Sean Whaley / Las Vegas Review-Journal 2-4-2015 Follytix, Foxcatchers and corporate weasels Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 2-3-2015 Sparks Tribune We Don't Need No Education Archive The ever-expanding Ira Hansen Archive of an anachronism BREAKING BAD Walter White and some other white guy Who's,,, ...Who? Breaking Bad 5: Machine Gun Michele and the good ole boys Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 12-16-2014 Sparks Tribune Breaking Bad 4: Ira and his ammosexuals flip us the finger Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 12-9-2014 Sparks Tribune / Updated 12-11-2014 Union decline and rising inequality in two charts by Colin Gordon Economic Policy Institute / 6-5-2012 Labor Day: State of the Unions By Mark Robison / Reno Gazette-Journal / Sunday 9-1-2013 The above graph was used in journalist Mark Robison's extensive Hard Labor: Nevada unions tout role in helping workers, firms, economy (Sunday 2 Sept. 2012 Reno Gazette-Journal, page one, Reno Rebirth section of the print edition). Union men Jim Burrell, Paul McKenzie and Guy Louis Rocha did the movement proud. WOMEN AND UNIONS — ORPHAN MAJORITIES The Barbwire Labor Day column Reno Gazette-Journal / 9-3-2012 ...and more ammo... We Don't Need No Education The continuing Barbwire series Barbwire: Nevada not really a state No, we were not Battle Born in Kenya Top 10 reasons Nevada lives in the 19th Century Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 10-17-2013 Sparks Tribune Low-income penalty: Nevada socks it to the working poor BARBANO: Nevada is one big company town Dennis Myers / Reno News & Review 10-10-2013 State of Health National health care comes up against a very sick state. WHAT'S IN IT FOR US? Dennis Myers / Reno News & Review 10-10-2013 ...and more ammo yet IMF Head Says Inequality Threatens Democracy. Here Are 7 Charts Proving She’s Right. By Erika Eichelberger / Mother Jones/BillMoyers.com 5-30-2014 “The behavior of the financial sector has not changed fundamentally…since the crisis. The industry still prizes short-term profit.” The Post-Dated Recession: Pay me now or pay me later Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 9-6-2012 Daily Sparks Tribune The Post-dated Recession By Joshua H. Silavent / Daily Sparks Tribune / 5-3-2011 Nevada Press Assn. Better Newspaper Contest 2013-14: BARBWIRE SCORES SIXTH NEVADA PRESS ASSOCIATION AWARD BRONZE 2014 Hopelessly trying to win an earthquake / 4-18-2013 The 2013 Loony Tunes Legislative Lexicon / 5-30-2013 The politics of media ga-ga boosterism / 3-20-2014 2012: WE WON —> BIG NEWS FROM THE NEVADA PRESS ASSOCIATION GOMORRAH SOUTH CONFAB—> BARBWIRE NOMINEE GUY RICHARDSON INDUCTED INTO NPA HALL OF FAME ON FIRST BALLOT Support legendary photographer Don Dondero next 2010 GOLD HAT TRICK: Barbwire takes first place three years in a row. The winning entries Suing for Schools: The 20-year shuck Expanded from the 2-21-2010 Daily Sparks Tribune RED flags flying low over Sparks Expanded from the 1-10-2010 Daily Sparks Tribune The wrath of self-righteous racism Expanded from the 11-8-2009 Daily Sparks Tribune Government contacts Nev. congressional delegation Nevada Legislature State of Nevada Secretary of State Carson City Clark County City of Las Vegas Douglas County Reno City Council Sparks City Council Washoe County Commission Washoe Registrar of Voters The campaign against forcibly-paid newspaper obituaries And they wonder why the newspaper business is dying?   The Dean's List    The Dean of Reno Bloggers could very well be Andrew Barbano, self-described "fighter of public demons," who started putting his "Barbwire" columns online in 1996 and now runs 10 sites. RENO NEWS & REVIEW, 11-9-2006 The 2009 first-place Nevada Press Association award winners Tony the Tiger & the flaky NFL Barbwire / 11-30-2008 Deregulation is never having to say you're sorry Barbwire / 8-3-2008 Nevada: A good place to visit, but do you want to live here? Barbwire / 6-15-2008 The 2008 first-place Nevada Press Association award winners The price of a piece / 6-17-2007 Boxing Pandora /9-23-2007 The Lady in the Red Dress 10-28-2007 1997 Pulitzer Prize entries The life and times of Travus T. Hipp The best who ever was   Get ahead of corporate-influenced news—>Subscribe to Barbwire Confidential

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Copyright © 1982-2015 Andrew Barbano

Andrew Barbano is a 46-year Nevadan, editor of NevadaLabor.com and JoeNeal.org; and former chair of the City of Reno's Citizens Cable Compliance Committee. He is producer of Nevada's annual César Chávez Day celebration and serves as first vice-president, political action chair and webmaster of the Reno-Sparks NAACP. As always, his opinions are strictly his own. E-mail barbano@frontpage.reno.nv.us.

Barbwire by Barbano moved to Nevada's Daily Sparks Tribune on Aug. 12, 1988, and has originated in them parts ever since.
Whom to blame: How a hall-of-famer's hunch birthed the Barbwire in August of 1987
Tempus fugit.

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