Barbwire by Barbano: Superspreaders, homotextuals & hall of famers

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BARBWIRE BY ANDREW BARBANO (775) 747-0544
For the 10-7-2020 Sparks Tribune / Updated 10-20-20

Intervention Mayday! Suicidal Nevada union workers

Greatest Hits Dept.

WE WON: BIG NEWS FROM THE NEVADA PRESS ASSOCIATION CONFAB IN GOMORRAH SOUTH —> BARBWIRE NOMINEE GUY RICHARDSON INDUCTED INTO HALL OF FAME ON FIRST BALLOT

Barbwire nominee Dennis Myers elected to NPA Hall of Fame

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and Jake Highton next
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10 the Hard Way
Barbwire wins 10th Nevada Press Association award

GOLD 2017-18

2018 First-Place Winners
From the depths of despair to the den of iniquity & holy of holies

"Excellent work. These are some of the most moving columns I've read."
— NPA contest judge/9-29-2018

The Grasshopper and
the Dragonfly
9-6-2017

Kicked off the Ledge
4-18-2017

NATIONAL NEWS FIRST-BREAK
Back to the Future in
Mississippi West Nevada
10-18-2017

Gold 2017
Don't ask Renown Med for marijuana to help your chemo
10-4-2016
We Don't Need No Education
Toxic turf threat ignored
12-13-2016
Kate Smith & Lady Gaga
2-14-2017

Bronze 6-pack
In the Uber-Nevada legislature, words can kill
4-28-2015
On artificial turf, don't breathe unless absolutely necessary (above)
11-24-2015
Leading questions, lead-headed leaders
1-19-2016

Hopelessly trying to win an earthquake
4-18-2013
2013 Loony Tunes Legislative Lexicon
5-30-2013
The politics of media ga-ga boosterism
3-20-2014

More statewide and national award winners

We Don't Need No Education—>
Neverending Barbwire Series

1997 Pulitzer Prize entries

Barbwire.TV:
15-year overnight success
Daily Sparks Tribune 2-10-2008

The Barbwire's Greatest Hits
Highlights from radio days
mp3 file

The Dean's List

The Dean of Reno Bloggers could very well be Andrew Barbano, self-described "fighter of public demons," who started putting his "Barbwire" columns online in 1996 and now runs 10 sites.

RENO NEWS & REVIEW, 11-9-2006

Tomorrow's news today —> Subscribe to Barbwire Confidential
TOP SECRET— HushHush!

Donald Trump is within striking distance of winning Nevada and if he does, union members may well be the deciding factor.
Zounds!
For decades, one of the deep dark secrets of organized labor has been that roughly four in 10 union members are registered Republicans. Look no further than retired Southern Pacific/Union Pacific workers in the Rail City known as Sparks.
Union election canvassers learned years ago not to knock on their doors. If they see you're campaigning for Democrats, most are likely to slam a door in your face.
To use an old Texas football term, they've done forgotten how to dance with who brung 'em. They are very upper middle class and financially quite secure due to their union jobs and now suffer a common affliction: Brain damage from pulling the ladder up behind them.
"As polls are beginning to show that Biden’s advantage over Trump gets narrow in key states, Democratic union workers are worried about Biden’s chances of victory. Biden had a five-point advantage or a 'likely Democrat' odds of seizing Nevada over Trump, according to the University of Nevada-Las Vegas Lee Business School poll and the Cook Political Report, respectively. As time goes on, however, the very same Cook Political Report went from 'likely' to 'lean Democrat.' Florida, another battleground state with more delegates, went from leaning Democrat to a toss-up. For battleground union workers in Nevada, the state’s local election is shaping up to be in favor of Trump," wrote Christian Spencer in TheGrio.com
“I think Nevada could end up very much like Michigan did in ‘16,” said D. Taylor, the head of Unite HERE, the powerful Culinary Workers Union’s national organization, Bloomberg News reported last month.
This explains why my old union has dispatched precinct canvassers north and south in the past few weeks.
"Hispanic Democratic voters in Nevada make up about 17 percent of the state’s eligible voters, Bloomberg reports. Former presidential candidate Sen. Bernie Sanders defeated Biden in the Nevada caucuses after his Vermont challenger won half the Hispanic vote, according to CNN’s entrance polls of the (February) caucuses," Spencer wrote.
Last Sunday, NBC News reported about Nevada Latinos worried that their mailed ballots won't count and are thus uptight about voting in person.
In must-win Ohio, a poll released Sunday shows Trump and Biden tied. Zounds.
"Labor leaders have worked for months to sell their members on Biden, hoping to avoid a repeat of 2016 when Donald Trump outperformed among union members and won the White House. But despite a bevy of national union endorsements for Biden and years of what leaders call attacks on organized labor from the Trump administration, local officials in critical battleground states said support for Trump remains solid," Politico reported on Sept. 22.
" 'We haven’t moved the needle here,' said Mike Knisley, executive secretary-treasurer with the Ohio State Building and Construction Trades Council, who estimated that about half of his members voted for Trump in 2016 and will do so again. 'Even if given all the information that’s been put out there, all the facts — just pick an issue that the president has had his hands in — it doesn’t make a difference,' ” he stated.
"Among members of North America’s Building Trades Unions, there is a dead heat in six swing states, with Biden receiving 48 percent of the vote and Trump 47 percent, according to an internal poll shared with Politico.
" '(Trump) has a very, very, very solid foundation of our members,' said James Williams, a vice-president of the International Union of Painters and Allied Trades, whose surveys of members painted a similar picture.
" 'They connect with his messaging and a lot of the fear-mongering going all the way back to when he was first elected with "Be afraid of the immigrant. The immigrant’s here to take your job."
" 'That resonated with our membership. They feel like their way of life and their way of living is under attack and without really understanding the dynamics at play. I mean, the immigrant worker is being abused by employers.'
"Trump’s support in some unions could provide an opening for him in the Midwest, particularly in the key Rust Belt states that powered Trump’s victory in 2016 — Pennsylvania, Michigan and Wisconsin — where union voters have a sizable impact. Roughly one in six voters nationwide is either a union member or comes from a union household, according to a (September) Gallup Poll, and that number rises to more than one in four in states like Michigan.
"Those voters, historically a bedrock of Democratic support, shifted away from the party in 2016, according to exit polls. Hillary Clinton won union voters by less than half as much as former President Barack Obama had four years earlier — and that swing alone may have been enough to account for her losses in Pennsylvania, Wisconsin and Michigan, one analysis found. Even if Biden takes back the White House, there could be far-reaching impacts on the Democratic Party and labor movement if that trendline persists.
"The question this year is whether Biden can win those union members back, and by how much. Some labor leaders said there is cause for hope for Biden: While many Trump voters remain firm in their support, they said, Biden is winning over more of their members than Clinton did. They attributed that in part to Trump’s handling of the coronavirus pandemic.
“ 'We’re seeing a whole different attitude toward Joe Biden than we saw mostly because Trump has a record of failure. Biden has a record of being there for us,” said Rick Bloomingdale, president of the Pennsylvania AFL-CIO.
“ ' It’s just a different feel out there. Obviously, we still have members who support Trump. ' ”
So what's the temperature here in the High Desert Outback of the American Dream? Look no further than Carson City, home to a huge number state workers, many now unionized. Former U.S. Sen. Dean Heller and current Congresscritter Mark Amodei , both Republicans, graduated from Carson High. With the exception of revered ex-teacher Bonnie Parnell, Carson hasn't elected a legislative Democrat for more than two decades.
Some Nevada unions are hanging tough, others are split and their leaders are worried.
Why Trump? Well, he's a guy, for starters. To use NBC reporter and author Katy Tur's reasoning as to why Trump won in 2016: "He entertained people and he looked strong."
The fake news NYTimes just did a long piece about Trump supporters who actually believe he will protect Obamacare's pre-existing condition mandate once it's repealed. Mama mia.
Union members supporting Trump are like any other Americans, easy to spook into voting against their own interests. Corporate America has invested billions to overturn Franklin Roosevelt's New Deal and they've done one helluva job.
Just keep the lower classes fighting for the crumbs that fall off the fatcat table so that they won't look up at who's eating their lunch.
Remember the old saying: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
Somebody cue The Who's "Won't Get Fooled Again."
It's crunch time. Which side are you on?
Take care of each other and be careful out there.
¡Sí se puede!
Be well. Raise hell. Esté bien. Haga infierno.
___________________
NevadaLabor.com Editor Andrew Barbano is a 51-year Nevadan whose reputation remains impervious to further augmentation or denigration. E-mail <barbano@frontpage.reno.nv.us> Barbwire by Barbano has originated in the Tribune since 1988.

BARBWIRE BY ANDREW BARBANO
From the 9-30-2020 Sparks Tribune

Superspreaders, homotextuals & hall of famers

As longtime readers expect, the legendary Barbwire investigative team spared every expense in obtaining an exclusive interview with Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg's replacement, Judge Amy Coney Barrett.

BARB-Q: Judge Barrett, you have seven children. What does your husband do?
ACB: Dishes.
BARB-Q: I hear you have matching bathrobes. What color are they?
ACB: You're kidding, right?
BARB-Q: You are a deeply religious person. Who's your favorite Catholic?
ACB: After last week, Mitt Romney, at least for awhile.
BARB-Q: What's your favorite movie?
ACB: "Hang 'em High." Clint's a great Republican.
BARB-Q: Any others?
ACB: "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids" and, after last week, "Fast & Furious."
BARB-Q: What's your favorite book of the Old Testament?
ACB: You're kidding, right?
BARB-Q: Who's your favorite Disney character?
ACB: Well, it used to be Donald Duck.
BARB-Q: Your mentor was Justice Antonino Scalia, for whom you clerked?
ACB: He is the father of modern textualism, basing decisions on the meaning of the words when the law in question was passed.
BARB-Q: So any word not in use before 1800 is suspect?
ACB: Cowabunga!
BARB-Q: Do you still go to confession?
ACB: No. My parish priest got really pissed off that I kept invoking attorney-client privilege or the Fifth Amendment.
BARB-Q: Do you think women should be ordained as priests?
ACB: Hell, no. Why open the door to another low-paid, long-hour job? I think Justice Ginsburg might agree on that one.
BARB-Q: If she wuz alive, she'd be turning over in her grave. Thank you, Mme. Justice-designate. Let's do this again soon.
ACB: Not if I can help it.
BRIGHT SHINING LIE DEPT. This tweet went out last Friday from Regional Transportation Commission bus system management: "Safety is everyone's responsibility." Except theirs.
"RTC and its contractors are doing their part and transit riders are urged to do theirs," the tweet chirped. "Follow the 3 Ws: Watch your distance, wash your hands and wear a mask."
Do lying tweeters grow longer beaks like Pinocchio with chicken feathers?
RTC sez they are enforcing Gov. Sisolak's mask mandate. Also a lie. Drivers who push masks get written up or fired. See the evidence for yourself at NevadaLabor.com/ The three Washoe County transit systems carry upwards of 20,000 passengers a day. Without masking, they are little more than rolling ocean liners, super-spreading deadly disease. And they're doing it on your dime, including buying expensive TV ads. Maybe they should change their name to the Regional Propaganda Commission.
RTC is currently comprised of County Commissioners Vaughn Hartung and Bob Lucey, joined by Reno Councilmembers Neoma Jardon and Oscar Delgado (the only Democrat on the board). The Sparks seat held by the late Mayor Ron Smith has been filled by Councilmember Kristopher Dahir (R). Moral obtuseness is a bi-partisan affliction.They won't lift a finger without you pushing. So push. Contact info at NevadaLabor.com/
Because government at all levels has failed to protect drivers and riders, the Teamsters Union has filed charges in federal court. Stay tuned.
SPEAKING OF UNION BUSTERS. The Reno Gazette-Journal ran a front page spread last Monday about "longtime northern Nevada builder Dianda Construction" changing its name to Plenium Builders.
Actually, they haven't been around very long at all. Longtime construction mogul Norm Dianda's sons started it a few years ago as a non-union, low-wage, questionably skilled enterprise. Dianda's Q&D Construction has been around for decades and is mostly unionized. Plenium fits right in to the anti-union bias of Sparks City Hall today. Five years ago, the city council loosened up skilled labor requirements to turn the failing Victorian Square into apartments on the cheap.
DONALD'S DUNCE DAY. Donald Trump, Jr., will campaign at Peterbilt Trucks in Sparks today. Feel free to attend if you want to catch your death during death-defyin' speechifying. Last week, Trump2 packed more than 800 into a 500-seat room in Chandler, Ariz. Almost all were maskless as well as clueless, like the guest of honor.
The speakers parroted every conspiracy theory in the book save for Sen. Ted Cruz, R-Tejas, assassinating President Lincoln, or somesuch.
An 18-year-old Republican finance student from Tucson, one of the few heretical mask wearers, expressed disappointment, describing the Trump re-election campaign as having the maturity level of a teenager. He was disappointed to see that the event was just a live trolling session.
Jonathan Gross wanted to hear about Trump policies. Nada.
"I came to hear about what Trump is planning to do with his re-election but it felt like just a slander of the left," he told the fake news New York Times.
ONE FOR THE GOOD GUYS. I am the only campaign manager I know who will close 2020 batting a thousand. I'm officially 1-0 after former Tribunite Dennis Myers was voted into the Nevada Press Association Hall of Fame. Dennis' nomination last year came a bit too close to his August 2019 death. He collapsed from a stroke at his Sparks apartment and never regained consciousness.
I submit that he was and remains the greatest journalist in Nevada history. Mark Twain, also in the NPA HOF, only lived here about three years. I was further delighted that longtime RGJ columnist and internationally noted auto critic and motorsports writer Cory Farley made it in while he is still around to enjoy it.
I got RGJ columnist/editor Guy Richardson into the HOF on my first try a few years back. Next up, a couple more immortal Trib vets: UNR journalism Prof. Jake Highton and world class photographer Don Dondero.
You will find bios of all of my nominees at NevadaLabor.com/ My labor of love memorializing Dennis remains his only formal obituary. It's worth reading because it links to so many of his greatest hits and was excerpted in the press association announcement.
We worked — ahem — independently together in knocking now-Sen. Ira Hansen, R-Sparks, out of the 2015 Nevada State Assembly speakership. (See the website for sordid details.) The story went viral from the Maui News to the Times, Post and Journal, then crossed the pond to The Guardian of London/UK.
ADVICE FROM ON HIGH. "Stay positive. Test negative," sez CBS news anchor Norah O'Donnell. RTC, are you listening?
Take care of each other and be careful out there.
¡Sí se puede!
Be well. Raise hell. Esté bien. Haga infierno.
___________________
NevadaLabor.com Editor Andrew Barbano is a 51-year Nevadan whose reputation remains impervious to further augmentation or denigration. E-mail <barbano@frontpage.reno.nv.us> Barbwire by Barbano has originated in the Tribune since 1988.

Margaret Dumont and Groucho Marx
Still crazy after all these years.

BARBWIRE BY ANDREW BARBANO
From the 9-23-2020 Sparks Tribune

Messages from the gods: Ignore at your peril

Blasphemy, defined as mocking someone's god, is the most popular capital sin in most religions. I prefer keeping my head by promoting presumption instead.
The preachers who irritate me most are those who presume and thus purport to speak for whatever god or Olympus they are selling.
Well today, I'm joining the rogues gallery of presumptuousness.
Look around you and tell me that whatever concept of the almighty you prefer is not sending serious telegrams by whatever means are available to omnipotent spirits.
Fire, ice, water, pestilence, disease, winds, storms, murder, mayhem, reality TV, carrier pigeon. God has even sent Donald Trump to us because She's fresh out of locusts.
We are now without both Rep. John Lewis and Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Czar Donaldov may have nominated a Scaliante homotextual to Mrs. Ginsburg's seat by the time you read this.
The Notorious RBG's best bud on the court was her polar opposite, Antonino the Ancient. (He was apparently a good comedian, so they got along.) La Scalia's method of judicial activism was to get out the dictionary, look up the meaning of words, and consider those the gospel according to the framers. Easier than working.
Indiana Judge Amy Coney Barrett, who has apparently grabbed the president by the presumption, believes that Chief Justice John Roberts has betrayed the commands of textualism. Zounds. Call out the dragoons and have the blackguard flogged, drawn and quartered.
I wonder how a fundamental homotextual like her could bear to live in the same town where Pete Buttigieg served as mayor. I also wonder if she voted for him. Probably not. No self-respecting Notre Dame professor would commit such blasphemy.
Theocracy has made a big comeback in recent years and the wave has yet to crest.
As poet e.e. cummings might say, this monster mannunkind is devolving.
Our shaky democracy might shortly devolve into national breakup or civil war. At least the National Rifle Association's clients will continue to profit.
THE PROBLEM. As always, control by the wealthy, whether in the flesh or in legal fictions called corporations, who rape and pillage the body politick.
THE SOLUTION. As always, expanding economic opportunity with a healing dash of human respect for this magical little place we've been given for just a little time.
John Lewis and Ruth Bader Ginsburg lived their lives that way.
Remember the end of e.e. cummings greatest line: "pity this monster mannunkind...not."
RNR REDUX. Former Reno Gazette-Journal investigative ace Frank X. Mullen now helms the online reincarnation of the Reno News & Review. Glad to see it. His latest scoop about local Q-Anon moonhowlers seeking out sex trafficking where it doesn't exist is a-must read. See the expanded web edition of this column at NevadaLabor.com/
CITY HALL HIJINX. Economic Development Authority of Washoe County (EDAWN) Executive Director Mike Kazmierski is actively campaigning for the defeat of Reno City Councilmember Jenny Brekhus, D. That's dumb politics, especially when your outfit is knocking down a cool $100,000 a year in cash support from both the cities of Reno and Sparks.
GOVERNMENT WASTE R US. Within a few days of being sued by the Teamsters Union, the Regional Transportation Commission and its bus system subcontractor Keolis-19 are paying for slick TV spots selling the bright, shining lie that they are complying with Gov. Steve Sisolak's mask mandate.
See all the evidence to the contrary for yourself at NevadaLabor.com/ The three Washoe County transit systems carry upwards of 20,000 passengers a day. Without masking, they are little more than rolling ocean liners, spreading deadly disease. And they're doing it on your dime.
The Sparks seat held by the late Mayor Ron Smith still needs filling. RTC is currently comprised of County Commissioners Vaughn Hartung and Bob Lucey, joined by Reno Councilmembers Neoma Jardon and Oscar Delgado (the only Democrat on the board). Doesn't matter. Moral obtuseness in bi-partisan. They won't lift a finger without you pushing. So push.
DEJA VU ALL OVER AGAIN. I've been on this beat for 50 years and nothing has changed. People of average means get elected to local government and are quickly surrounded by sycophantic buzzards who pick the public's pocketbook clean. It's called economic development by its supporters, corporate welfare by its detractors. (See the NevadaLabor.com corporate welfare archive.)
If you ever wonder why local schools, parks, roads and first responders are underfunded, now you know one big reason.
ETHIX, EFFLUENT AND AFFLUENCE. Lemmon Valley activist Tammy Holt-Still has filed a complaint with the Nevada Ethics Commission about Reno Councilmember Bonnie Weber, R, but that's not all.
Did you know that University of Nevada researchers would not test that open cesspool in Lemmon Valley (euphemistically called Swan Lake) for Coronavirus and other gremlins, but does so with sewage effluent in more affluent areas? Did you know that developers want to subdivide Swan Lake for sale when it dries up, just like the scam they pulled in the southeast Reno flood plain
Stay tuned and keep your waders handy.
Take care of each other and be careful out there.
¡Sí se puede!
Be well. Raise hell. Esté bien. Haga infierno.
___________________
NevadaLabor.com Editor Andrew Barbano is a 51-year Nevadan whose reputation remains impervious to further augmentation or denigration. E-mail <barbano@frontpage.reno.nv.us> Barbwire by Barbano has originated in the Tribune since 1988.

Diabolical Déjà Vu: Fire is the Devil's only friend
Barbwire accurately called 2016 presidential result 9 months out & stands behind 2020 prediction made four years ago
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 9-2-2020 Sparks Tribune

History foreshadows a GOP November win
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 2-16-2016 Sparks Tribune / Updated 2-19, 3-1, 3-8, 5-19 and 11-19-2016, 12-24-2019

President Donald Trump as Andrew Jackson? So opined a plethora of prestigious, highly-paid expert pundits on election night. The Barbwire warned of exactly that last March. Twice.
And that ain't all. Read 'em and weep, pilgrims.

Nobody knows nothin'
By David Horsey, Staff Cartoonist / Los Angeles Times 11-9-2016
BARBWIRE SEZ the awesome Mr. Horsey's assertion that only the LAT/USC poll was accurate ain't necessarily so.

Those with crystal balls shouldn't throw stones
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 3-15-2016 Sparks Tribune

Remembering the first female U.S. presidents
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 3-8-2016 Sparks Tribune

"Any system of prolonged political paralysis and failed liberalism vomits up monsters. And the longer we remain in a state of political paralysis — especially as we stumble toward another financial collapse — the more certain it becomes that these monsters will take power." — Christopher Hedges at NationOfChange.org 17 Oct. 2016.

All the more reason to subscribe to Barbwire Confidential.

Donny & Jimmy's Most Excellent White Castle Adventure
Barbwire by Barbáno / Expanded from the 9-16-2020 Sparks Tribune

Margaret Dumont and Groucho Marx
Still crazy after all these years.

Barbwire Confidential —>HushHush!
Donny & Jimmy's Most Excellent White Castle Adventure
BARBWIRE EXCLUSIVE 9-12-2020

The world class Barbwire investigative team has spared every expense to obtain a secret internal memo from an inside GOP source, DeepGLOP:

TO: Chairpersons, both Nevada Republican Parties (you know who you are)
FROM: Strategery Dept.
RE: Presidential visit this weekend in the Douglas County Alabaster Bastion

Greatest Hits Dept.

WE WON: BIG NEWS FROM THE NEVADA PRESS ASSOCIATION CONFAB IN GOMORRAH SOUTH —> BARBWIRE NOMINEE GUY RICHARDSON INDUCTED INTO HALL OF FAME ON FIRST BALLOT

Barbwire nominee Dennis Myers elected to NPA Hall of Fame

Support Don Dondero
and Jake Highton next
Send endorsements

10 the Hard Way
Barbwire wins 10th Nevada Press Association award

GOLD 2017-18

2018 First-Place Winners
From the depths of despair to the den of iniquity & holy of holies

"Excellent work. These are some of the most moving columns I've read."
— NPA contest judge/9-29-2018

The Grasshopper and
the Dragonfly
9-6-2017

Kicked off the Ledge
4-18-2017

NATIONAL NEWS FIRST-BREAK
Back to the Future in
Mississippi West Nevada
10-18-2017

Gold 2017
Don't ask Renown Med for marijuana to help your chemo
10-4-2016
We Don't Need No Education
Toxic turf threat ignored
12-13-2016
Kate Smith & Lady Gaga
2-14-2017

Bronze 6-pack
In the Uber-Nevada legislature, words can kill
4-28-2015
On artificial turf, don't breathe unless absolutely necessary (above)
11-24-2015
Leading questions, lead-headed leaders
1-19-2016

Hopelessly trying to win an earthquake
4-18-2013
2013 Loony Tunes Legislative Lexicon
5-30-2013
The politics of media ga-ga boosterism
3-20-2014

More statewide and national award winners

We Don't Need No Education—>
Neverending Barbwire Series

1997 Pulitzer Prize entries

Barbwire.TV:
15-year overnight success
Daily Sparks Tribune 2-10-2008

The Barbwire's Greatest Hits
Highlights from radio days
mp3 file

The Dean's List

The Dean of Reno Bloggers could very well be Andrew Barbano, self-described "fighter of public demons," who started putting his "Barbwire" columns online in 1996 and now runs 10 sites.

RENO NEWS & REVIEW, 11-9-2006

Tomorrow's news today —> Subscribe to Barbwire Confidential
TOP SECRET— HushHush!

As you are aware, our leader will descend hereabouts this weekend, flying thru hellfire and damnation into Reno, then driving — driving! — an hour each way to get to the postage-stamp Minden Airport. Such an indignity was foisted upon him by frightened Nevada liberals because polls show the state in almost a dead heat (treasonous liberal by 4, +/- 3, adjust for fake news bias).

We believe we have solved the transportation situation. We have suggested that he fly from Reno to Minden aboard a Nevada National Guard helicopter – on the same day that his cutting the guard's COVID-19 budget has Democratic Gov. Steve Sisolak screaming like a stuck donkey. Revenge is a dish best served cold, eh, fellow Klingons?

Please turn out your die-hards (and I mean that literally, see below). Tell them not to wear masks as it just pisses off the old man. You can wear your cammos but please leave your machine guns at home. Oops, I forgot — we're talking Douglas County. Bring the heat. And your babies.

I hope they don't invite that treasonous library director who's trying to pervert the minds of our children with sympathy for black and brown terrorists. Does anybody know if Nevada Assembly Minority Leader Jim Wheeler can attend? The president would like a guy who says he'd vote for slavery if his constituents want it. That's true back-to-the-future democracy, not that wussy booklearning stuff.

We can turn defiance of Nevada's Antifa pro-mask governor into a net positive while cutting our losses. Make sure to keep detailed records of everyone who shows up. Some may exhibit COVID-19 symptoms from the rally shortly before insecure vote-by-mail ballots are sent in about two weeks.

Follow up and instruct them to get their ballots early if at all possible, then fill out a straight GOP ticket and promptly return them to their voter registrar's office.

DO NOT trust the postal service. We can't let word get out that Republicans know how to mail letters.

This is a win-win situation for the president. Dead or alive or hospitalized, all of the rally attendees will have voted, so their votes will count.

If some of them die before election day, the party will have proof positive that dead people are voting by mail, proving the president correct, as always.

What's not to like?

Yours in victory should you live long enough,

Luther Lovelace
Deep State Covert Consultant and freelance pet and birthday photographer
(You know how to contact me via the Dark Web. Today's user name is KochAin't )

ps: Hyper-liberal California Antifa thugs have rigged it so that the skies will look like the 7th circle of hell on Saturday. To keep our attendees safe until they can vote, please inform them not to breathe unless absolutely necessary.

END OF LEAKY MEMO. DISTRIBUTE AT WILL. OR NOT.

###

Andrew Barbano is a 51-year Nevadan whose reputation is impervious to further augmentation or denigration. For unparalleled coverage of the August 8 Black Lives Don't Matter mashup in Minden, go to NevadaLabor.com (unless you are easily offended because much offense was offered thereat). You will also be treated to the 2016 world champion political 'toon and the 2020 frontrunner. HOT TIP: Monitor NevadaLabor.com for major union news breaking within 48 hours.

9-16-2020 Sparks Tribune add-ons

THE AWFUL TRUTH. The above went out to a few hundred thousand of my e-mail co-conspirators in advance of Czar Donaldov's sojourn to the whitest part of Nevada last Saturday. It received the usual range of comments from the usual suspects.

One freedom loving racist in Gomorrah South trashed me for obviously defending George Floyd, the Minneapolis black man who died of a drug overdose.

Except he didn't. The coroner ruled it a homicide by cop and four fired officers now face felony charges. Obviously a Fox News fan.

The most curious result came from people I'd confused. I apologized, as creating confusion is one of my few talents. (Damn...I could'a been president.)

Some people actually wondered if the letter from "Luther Lovelace" (son of a famous movie star, perhaps?) was authentic.

I didn't think about it as I worked on it, but it really shows how hard it is to lampoon a real-life cartoon. The essence of a joke is stretching reality till it's funny. For the most part, El Presidente has already pushed it about as far as it can go. He tries to put us comedians out of work, then brags about job creation. What a guy.

There is justice in the world. Trump actually had to drive the 60+mile route both ways. I guess the guv wouldn't let him use a chopper.

Oh, the humanity!

HAT TRICK. I guess now I've done it all. The above hit on Trump was my third bruise on a president. Back in 1982, when Ronald Reagan was on his way to UNR to speak, I placed "None of Above" billboards on his motorcade route. (See NAGPAC.org)

In 1988, I accompanied some clients to hear then-VP George HW Bush speak at Reno High. While standing in line, I spoke with reporters from the Reno Gazette-Journal and Associated Press. I asked if they might have that morning's Wall Street Journal in their newsrooms. Affirmative.

I then called their attention to a front page story about how Bush the Elder was giving boring speeches filled with "cliches and bromides" and that his handlers were worried about his presidential campaign.

Sure enough, in addressing the crowd at the Reno High gym, he used some of the tired items the WSJ had noted. So the spin nationwide the next day was all about Bush giving another tired, hackneyed speech.

The above potshot at the Orange Crush gives me a hat trick. Keep lobbing up the softballs, guys. I'll swing for the seats, but only if the fans are masked.

SUE THE BASTARDS. Go to NevadaLabor.com to read the latest volley in the war to protect local bus passengers and drivers. My friends at Teamsters Local 533 have sued the operators of the local transit system for refusing to comply with Gov. Sisolak's order to wear masks. They filed last Friday in federal court.

I have built an entire website about the dereliction of duty by the Regional Transportation Commission of Washoe County. Call 'em, e-mail them, text them, tell them they are falling down in their most basic duty to the public.

The Regional Transportation Commission of Washoe County is comprised of Washoe County Commissioners Vaughn Hartung (R) and Bob Lucey (R); Reno City Councilmembers Neoma Jardon (R) and Oscar Delgado (D). The City of Sparks seat is vacant. Sparks Mayor Ron Smith's (R), passing was announced on August 19. Requiescat in pace.

Some 20,000 people a day are potentially exposed to COVID-19 on those rolling ocean liners.

Read "No pants? No service. No mask? OK" at NevadaLabor.com/

Once again, that's not a put-on. You can't ride the bus naked (like the trouserless Sparks guy who was refused boarding), but you can with a naked face.

Take care of each other and be careful out there.

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SITE NAVIGATION TIPS: When all else fails, read the instructions (A favorite John Hanks aphorism I've been using for decades)