Know any rape victims? Of course you do. Me, too. I almost married one when we were young and beautiful.

Call her Vanessa. She closely resembled Oscar-winning actress Cate Blanchett, born with supermodel grace. Vanessa could don a burlap sack and make it look stylish. We met in college and soon learned that we were a matched pair from follytix to Beethoven.

Vanessa was so brilliantly cool that she named her horse after one of the Nine Muses of Greek mythology. I even got to ride Melpomene one fine day. Little did I know then the dark irony of gentle 'Pom's name.

Melpomene was the muse of tragedy in the liberal and fine arts, the metaphysical source of inspiration to poets, dramatists and authors. I guess I resemble that remark. I've been quoting her vassal Vanessa in this column for years.

Lilting Vanessa's older brother had been killed in Vietnam not long before I met her. The family, of course, was devastated.

"I saw my father become an old man in one day," she told me. Her parents remain among the finest people I've ever met. I wanted them for in-laws.

If you look back at the milestones of your life, Vanessa was one of mine. Her dad once advised that I venture into public relations, something that had never occurred to me. Later, I started knocking on Las Vegas advertising agency doors and was soon writing for three of them. Without that idea, you might not be reading this.

Vanessa's brother bore a close resemblance to actor Steve McQueen. After "The Sand Pebbles" was released in 1966, starring McQueen and Candice Bergin, Vanessa said she wanted to get up the courage to see it if I'd go with her. We never did.

The theme from the Robert Wise film became a hit for British singer Matt Monroe, "We Were Lovers." The past tense provided another dark portent.

One day as we drove to Fresno State in my tricked-out '63 Buick Riviera, out of nowhere she blurted that her brother "tried to rape me when I was a little girl. I had strong legs from being on the swim team and kicked him away. I didn't remember that until now."

She never mentioned it again. She flew to Las Vegas in 1969 to say goodbye. I never got a good reason. It hurt. Still does. I only saw her once more when my brother returned from 'Nam later that year. We never met again.

As old widowers are wont to do, a few years ago I punched her name into a web browser and up came Dr. Vanessa's obituary. She never escaped Fresno and died relatively young of cancer in that polluted valley.

I had found the address of her professional office several years earlier and was tempted to write a note. Never did. When the Vietnam Wall website was launched, I almost left a condolence for the family because there were none at her brother's page. Never did.

Her obituary left me cold. Her older brother was totally written out of it. It termed her the second child of her parents and that she had healed a lot of people. Did the psychologist ever heal herself? Apparently not.

The minds of children are like the pristine high desert. There are places not far from here where you can find 19th Century covered wagon tracks. The scars just do not heal.

Vanessa had been traumatized at least twice. She discovered the body of a drowning victim when she was a child, then came the brother she erased. I hope otherwise, but I'm not sure she ever had a successful relationship. Her mom informed me of a short marriage and divorce back in the 1970s.

Did her brother do more than try to rape her? I'll never know. I do know the wagon tracks abided forever.

Which is why I believe the testimony of another psychologist, Dr. Christine Blasey Ford, about Judge Brett Kavanaugh.

Vanessa never recovered from her childhood traumas.

Fast forward to another lady of my acquaintance many decades later. She had been sexually abused by her own father during childhood. Unlike Vanessa, who would fall into days of dark depression, this lady lashed out when triggered at random times. She was once estranged from her family for years after falling into a flaming rage at Thanksgiving.

Her family figured that grandma was just getting addle-pated. They never knew what her father did. The scars never healed. I give you Dr. Christine Blasey Ford.

If you don't think you know any rape victims, think again.

Be well. Raise hell.

Esté bien. Haga infierno. (Pardon my Spanglish.) / être bien, élever l'enfer (And my French.) / Stammi bene. Scatenare l'inferno. (And Italian.)
_______
Andrew Barbano is a 50-year Nevadan, executive producer of Nevada's annual César Chávez Day celebration, first vice-president and political action chair of the Reno-Sparks NAACP, labor/consumer/civil rights advocate, member of Communications Workers of America Local 9413/AFL-CIO and editor of NevadaLabor.com and BallotBoxing.US and SenJoeNeal.org and DoctorLawyerWatch.com/ As always, his opinions are strictly his own. E-mail barbano@frontpage.reno.nv.us. Barbwire by Barbano has originated in the Sparks Tribune since 1988 and received its ninth Nevada Press Association award and 6th first-place at the 29 Sept. 2018 NPA annual convention in Las Vegas. (That trophy and about six bucks will get you a Latte Mocha Cotsafracas Chingade at just about any Starbux worldwide, guaranteed.)

WEB XTRAS & SMOKING GUNS —>

THE BIG 3-0. Sunday, August 12, 2018, marked 30 years since the first Barbwire appeared in the Rail City's newspaper of record since 1910. "The Chilling of Hot August Nights" brought the first of nine Nevada Press Association awards. I'll add more memories of the early days of the Barbwire as time, space and the political season allow. (See right. —>)

Whom to blame: How a hall-of-famer's hunch birthed the Barbwire in August of 1987
Tempus fugit.

Sore-oppressed Soul-Sister Cities:
Menlo Park and Reno-Sparks-Fernley share similarly sad high-tech stretch marks

"All humanity has left the area": paying for Tesla's Gigafactory
Barbano and Nevada conservatives decry corporate welfare depredations
By Rory Carroll / The Guardian 7-3-2018
Editor's Note: The Guardian publishes 180,000 newspapers daily in London and environs and generates ONE BILLION monthly web page views. (I should live so long.)

"Facebook is taking everything": rising rents drive out Silicon Valley families
Property companies advertising their proximity to Facebook’s campus are giving low-income residents a choice: pay a huge rent increase or move out
By Sam Levin / The Guardian 6-20-2018

Peruse the Underbelly of the News —> Subscribe to Barbwire Confidential

For all the news you never knew you needed to know 'til now: Tell your friends and friendly enemies to subscribe to Barbwire Confidential for warm laughter, cheap thrills, hot scoops and occasional cold logic at BallotBoxing.US/ Cheap at twice the price. (Hush Hush!)