Barbwire by Barbano: Poison Annie's Revenge

   Everybody knows the dice are loaded.
Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed.
   Everybody knows the war is over.
Everybody knows the good guys lost.
   Everybody knows the fight was fixed.
The poor stay poor, the rich get rich.
   That's how it goes. Everybody knows...
Everybody knows the scene is dead
   But there's gonna be a meter on your bed
That will disclose
   What everybody knows...
   Everybody talking to their pockets.
Everybody wants a box of chocolates
   and a long red rose.
   Everybody knows. Everybody knows.
That's how it goes. Everybody knows.

— Leonard Cohen, 1934-2016

By Leonard Cohen (1934-2016) & Sharon Robinson
© 1988 CBS Records, Inc.

I hope you understand I just had to go back to the island.
— Leon Russell, 1942-2016

The Gorsuch Nonesuch: Poison Annie's Revenge
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 2-7-2017 Sparks Tribune / Expansions in blue / Updated 2-16 and 2-21-2017; 7-8-2022

Let's get this out of the way upfront. With respect to Tsar Donaldo Vladimirovitch's first supreme court appointee, I will not ask if the fruit can fall far from the tree.

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Be well. Raise hell.

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"If you want to attack Anne Gorsuch Burford, the first woman appointed as the head of the EPA, now deceased, and impute her alleged sins to her son, a distinguished jurist of impeccable reputation, then you are free to do so. But if you do, there are those who might be tempted to ask you 'Sir, at long last, have you no sense of decency?' "

One of my correspondents last week employed the classic gimlet which attorney Joseph Welch used as a scalpel to torpedo the credibility of Sen. Pat McCarran's best bud, Sen. Joe "Commies Under Every Bed" McCarthy.

Anybody who wants to accuse me of holding the son responsible for the sins of his mother, be advised that it's already been done online and via the airwaves.

Such kneejerk response misses my point: With the nomination of Poison Annie's progeny, Judge Neil Gorsuch, Tsar Vladimirovitch and Rasputin Breitbartsky have deftly engineered an inside triple play, a three-layered insult to environmentalism, a joke which all moonhowlers will immediately understand.

In 1981, King Ronnie the Vague appointed Anne Gorsuch Burford to head the Environmental Protection Agency, an institution she reviled.

The Tsar's current nominee, oil patch politician Scott Pruitt, is cut from the same ideological cloth and likewise assigned to destroy.

Poison Annie did her best to dismantle the EPA and gloried in the destruction and carnage even as she walked out the door in disgrace. She was the first cabinet minister ever cited for contempt of Congress and resigned after Reagan threw her under the bus.

Her defense was the ancient war crime cop-out: I was just following orders.

The Reaganauts ordered her not to comply with congressional subpoenas about more than $1 billion of Toxic Waste Superfund mismanagement.

When the White House abandoned its executive privilege claims, she walked after just 22 months on the job. Her chief aide, Rita Lavelle, went to jail for perjury.

The nomination of Poison Annie's kid is a multi-layered insult to tree huggers without explicitly stating it, thus eliminating the risk of righteous (but nonetheless off the mark) reactions such as stated by my learned legal correspondent.

Rasputin is truly an evil genius.

WHERE CREDIT IS DUE DEPT. I stole the appellation "Poison Annie" from the late, great Tribune columnist and talk radio legend Travus T. Hipp, whom I assume would approve such Gorsuch usage were he still available to grant it.

END OF TIMES SURVIVAL KIT. Defend yourself with humorous or humorless but always-peerless predictions for 2017 by subscribing to the Barbwire Confidential News Service.

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THE GOOD DON. Nominations are afoot for the Nevada Press Association Hall of Fame.

Time to ramp up for world-famous Tribune photographer Don Dondero. Details at the Barbwire.US web edition.

Be well. Raise hell. / Esté bien. Haga infierno.
______________
Andrew Barbano is a 48-year Nevadan and editor of NevadaLabor.com. E-mail <barbano@frontpage.reno.nv.us> Barbwire by Barbano has originated in the Sparks Tribune since 1988.

ONLINE EXTRAS —> SMOKING GUNS

Poison Annie's Revenge Executed
Barbwire by Andrew Quarantino Barbáno / Expanded from the Sparks Tribune 7-6-2022

Reidless or Rudderless?
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 2-21-2017 Sparks Tribune
Kate Smith & Lady Gaga
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 2-14-2017 Sparks Tribune / Updated 2-16, 2-17 and 2-21-2017
Smoot, smut and stash
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 1-31-2017 Sparks Tribune
The last question
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 1-24-2017 Sparks Tribune
Patient Zero Plagues
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 1-17-2017 Sparks Tribune
Democrats in Margaritaville
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 1-10-2017 Sparks Tribune
Regressions, Transitions and Predictions
Barbwire by Barbano / Expanded from the 1-3-2017 Sparks Tribune

TOMORROW'S NEWS TODAY: FEEL UP YOUR FIRE METER. The Reno Gazette-Journal did big spreads on three consecutive Sundays (Sept. 14, Sept. 21 and Sept. 28, 2014) on NV Energy smart meter fires. Welcome aboard. Barbwire readers were two years ahead on the fire meter issue. (Touch a Smart Meter, Go to Jail — 11 October 2012)

ANTE INTO THE GAME: Support the new season of Barbwire.TV by putting your money where my mouth is. A thousand thanks to those who keep sending show suggestions.

I encourage you to donate to the cause at Barbwire.TV/ The medium that shapes public opinion needs at least one refuge where it is not filtered through the distorted green eye shades of prissy corporate accountants for whom profit is the only priority; where self-censorship is the journalist's normal work environment and where all sins of omission are tacitly encouraged and forgiven with the wave of a balance sheet. This is important. We've got a lot of work to do.